Impressions

Is this a graduation party? Wow, it's in a pool. Everyone crowd onto this boat, it's time to go.

Enter: green, murky, shallow swamp. What's this, a wagon train of canoes? Where are we going? Oh look, a snake. How cute. No, don't get out to catch it. Oh well, at least the water's not that deep. Holy shit, get back in the boat! THAT one's humongous! Look!... wow ... look how it swims in a spiral... I'm pretty sure snakes that big don't grow well in water this shallow.

Ah, back at port. Hey, look, another group of people. Wait - that's - that's us! No, no, stay back. Look, they're going in the buiding. We can watch them from this overhang here. Damn, we're trapped in some sort of time flux. How do we get out? No, we can't ask our past selves! That'd completely screw up the space-time continuum! What are you thinking?



Wow, this place is really kind of dark. But look at all these fish and reptiles and such! No, sorry, I don't work here. Hey, Kevin, nice store. Boy, it sure is dank.



Maybe if... if I angle my way across the lawn here they won't notice I'm gone... no, they're telling me to get back in line. Dang, college campuses are too open. These people seem nice enough, but I can tell they've got something nasty planned for us.

What? I'm a finalist in some stupid talent competition? Fine. I don't know about the rest of you, but my goal is to not win. Oh? My turn? Well, I was already up here. I can't really turn back now.
What is a ball to a puppy?
Is this some sort of analogy test? No, wait. That's simple... a toy. That's right, I'm supposed to be trying to win. Now maybe if I kneel down amidst these small children and look introspective I can gain get some of the audience to like me. Let me study this book. Here.

Well, now that that's over with I can- wait, what? we have to go to kyra's musical? Dang it, I thought I was finally free to do what I wanted. What, we're ALL in it? Um, okay. Let's get in this capsule-shaped thing and drive there.

Okay, I guess I'll get in costume and pretend I know what I'm doing. I hope Mrs. L.H. isn't mad at me for not coming to any rehearsals. Kellen seems to have a decent idea of what's going on, I'll follow her. Whew. This is ridiculous, but it's not that bad.







I like this house. Some of you should stay outside.

It's got to be here, it absolutely has to be here... I'm sure I left it here in the other dimension... quick, the wind is picking up, we have to find it before the universe collapses. Try turning on and off all the lights and here, hold this. Shit. Electricity's gone out.
No, no, I know it was here... goddamnit!
I know this is where I left it!
I know, I know, it's time to go,
running out of time
but
I know it's here

Anti venom

A baby girl has been bitten by one of the many venomous snakes kept in the outdoor laboratory with glass walls. She is in a coma and will die soon if she does not receive the anti venom. All the other scientists wander around aimlessly because they have no volunteers to help in the brewing process. Exasperatedly, I tell them I will help if they will hurry their asses up and get it made. Walking down the hallway with one white lab coated woman with horn-rimmed glasses, she tells me what role I will play in making the anti venom. I do not understand her instructions at all.
We watch the other scientists get the ingredients by sliding the snakes around on a sieve with beauty bark. The snakes react to the beauty bark and secrete a liquid onto a cookie sheet, which the scientists pour into my mouth and instruct me to swish until they tell me it is done. The liquid tastes and feels like strawberry fluoride mouthwash. The scientists also look like dental hygienists, I now realize.

I spend the rest of the dream wandering around swishing the strawberry-flavored anti-venom in my cheeks, but I can't help but swallow a little. I wonder if this will adversely affect my health.

At one point I sit on a staircase next to a girl who tries to start a friendly conversation with me. All I can do is flap my hands around, trying to mime that I am helping to produce an anti venom in my cheeks for a baby girl in a coma, and drool a bit. I think it is unfortunate that the girl probably thinks I have some sort of mental handicap now, because I would have liked to be her friend.

At another point, a different set of adults in white lab coats is after me, and I try to hide from them by climbing up the rose trellis on the outside of the old house in which they are looking for me, but it only leads me to a large window, through which they spot me. While climbing down I lose the remaining fluoride/anti venom from my cheeks, but by this time it seems the scientists have forgotten about me and the baby in a coma and moved on to a more interesting research problem.

Epic

We begin the saga on a flat, featureless prairie. We are on the outskirts of some sort of amusement park, but there are ominous overtones to the place. Standing by a water slide that is reminiscent of hamster mazes, we discuss the issue of the park's evil overlord and the many deaths that have recently occurred. We decide that escape is a necessity.
I go to saddle my horse, only to find that I never unsaddled him yesterday. He is quite disgruntled at that fact, and when I lead him out of the pen he bites my arm and will not release me. He is carfeul not to hurt me, though.
As we ride out of the yard, we are confronted by a large, rusty, hovering robot. It cackles evilly. I try to ride around it, but it is having none of that.
It morphs into a pyramidic wizard, clad in purple robes and hat. He transports us onto a flate plane of ice, where the sun shines glaringly and there is nothing but ice and sky. As he flies around us, he leaves a technicolor trail of slime behind him, which we must avoid in our escape. As my horse and I are fairly adept at avoiding him, he summons two beings, one female, one male. The man, which I gather to be the sun, glimmers with moving colors on the cool end of the spectrum. The female, the moon, shines with orange, magenta, and yellow, much like the slime in Mario Sunshine. I avoid their balls of slime, galloping across the ice, and scoop up the penguin that they are suddenly attempting to obliterate. We make it past a stand of pine trees and are transported out of the ice plain.

I am standing on the sidewalk along 1st at night. I am wearing some sort of spandex suit, bright yellow, designed to keep me from being seen. My companion, a veteran at these nighttime excursions, is clad in white spandex. We are trying to cross the street. He claims that if he flashes a very bright light from the stoplight above, the people in the cars will not be able to see us and we can cross in safety.
Doing so, we scoot across the street and to the pet store. My friend picks the lock and we sneak inside. I look through the bin of colored plastic snakes for the ones that will provide us with a key, as he goes to the back to look for something. Sorting through the snakes, a notice a small child standing in the doorway, curiously. I decide they will not do any harm and go back to my snake-sorting. Glancing back up at the child I realize it's actually a skunk! I exit hastily.

I am a butler for a wealthy victorian family. I have found an estate for them to live on. Visiting the house, the real estate agent says it will be good publicity to have an idyllic family living here. In a yellow and green bedroom filled with sun, the wife says she'll not be idylllic if she were paid a million dollars. The agent looks disappointed, but sells us the house anyway.
Some time later, the daughters are seen playing on the lawn as a procession of dignitaries winds its way up the drive to the house. As a wealthy man gives a speech, the wife comes downstairs and announces that her husband is dead. At this, the man speaking goes stiff and dies, too. They try to bring the husband down the stairs into the room, but realizing that two dead men in a room is bad luck, they stop hastily and try to backtrack. The only succeed in dropping the dead man, much to their consternation.

Jammed!

Gabriella stands on the top back of my teal typewriter, somehow positioned such that pressing the keys does nothing to the page. She looks at me very seriously and shakes a finger at me. I feel overwhelming confusion, and look around for snakes. Luckily there are none.