Doom and General Incompetency

My sister skateboards down our driveway into the garage. It is warm and sunny outside, though exceedingly clear, like a winter day. I want to learn to skate, so she hops off and I change the music in the CD player. Though it's not on the CD I insert, The Decemberist's "Oceanside" comes on. I can hear more clearly than ever before the chord structure and strumming patterns, as if the crisp air aids the sound waves on their way to my ear. I realize that for too long, I have been attempting to play this song incorrectly. I will never amount to the musician I should. After aa few minutes spent putting one foot on the skateboard and promptly falling off, I go back inside.

We file into a dimly lit movie theater. Someone inside tells us the movie will not be starting until an hour later, and this is definitely not okay with me. My friends sit down to wait patiently, but I leave again.

Anne Bertucio has left me a note that says "SNACKS." I realize that I was supposed to be organizing the food for the floor meeting that is convening in a matter of minutes. As people begin to gather, I have to tell them that I failed in my food mission. I think to myself that it's because I only just got the note, but in my subconscious I know that it really is my fault.

I have been jettisoned into space with several nuclear missiles. I see that I am drifting towards a glowing orb, which I soon come to realize is the sun. It is my mission to destroy it before it engulfs the earth. I fire several missiles into its center, but nothing happens. The fiery mass grows larger and larger, and I know that soon I will be incinerated. Before this, in an attempt to document my experiences before it's too late, it tell ground control that space is awesome. Like hot dogs. I brace myself for the searing pain, and as the heat increases, I bring a book of instructions up to cover my eyes. Nothing happens. Bringing the book down again, I find I have somehow been turned around and am heading away from the Sun. I rejoice. A book has once again saved my life.

Paris Adventures

Several people from the program are with me on the RER out of Paris. We try to get off, but realise at the last minute that the only exit is at the very back of the train, so we all run, dodging passengers, and hop off. Jessica is the last one and gets stuck inside. She waves to us sadly as the train goes back in the direction it came.

I am visiting a family in France; I must find the correct piece for the symphony to play before the evil conductor (the architect of the Basilica of Sacre Coeur) find the piece he wants the symphony to play.

I have been speeing in a tree. I wake up and sleepily roll over. My vision in very fuzzy, and I can't make out what I am seeing, but after a few seconds I realize I am laying beneath a veil. Sitting on the branch directly above me are two cats. They are frighteningly close, peering at me intently with very animated expressions. I am afraid they might attack me, so I meow at them. They jump down and frolic around, and I come out and play with them.

Someone comes in my room at the MEC while I am sleeping and says, "Look at all this stuff spread around here! It's like you've moved in for a month. How are you going to get it packed up and moved into your other room by noon?" It is 10:30 in the morning. I thought I was supposed to stay in the new room for a week, so I go down to the front desk in my pyjamas to ask if I really need to switch rooms. I ask the a lady I do not recognize, and she tells me, "You have to ask your friend." I look around and Alex is sitting on the couch. I go and sit down next to him, asking, "What are you doing here?"
He doesn't answer, but I don't remember asking the question, so I ask, "Why did you tell them to switch my room?"
He answers, "Because you can sleep in my room."
"And I'll be sleeping...?" "
On the couch," he replies. There is an awkward moment, because I didn't know he had a couch in his room so I hadn't been expecting that answer, and he said it like I shouldn't have asked the question. Also, the couch he is referring to is the one from the computer lab that is comfortable for about two peole to sit on, but certainly not for sleeping.
"Of course," I reply.

Jazz Ensemble

I knock on Robin's front door, trying to pick something up before she leaves for the competition. She lets me in, and Steven leads me in to the living room. I hear jazz coming out of the other room, across the outdoor cooridoor, something I can recognize, and I ask who is playing. Someone listens for a minute and says, "Well it must be Brianna on first trombone it it sounds like that..."
Sometime later I wander over to the room where the jazz is coming from, to find Devin, Matt, Julianne, Kari, Gracie, and Mr. Babcock/Steen lying on their backs on the ground in their pajamas, knees bent, playing their instruments. Someone tells me, "That isn't Devin, that's Devin the newest freshman, who took on second chair." I walk among them; Mr. Babcock/Steen is wearing briefs over bike shorts.

Anxieties

The band is putting on a concert that is the culmination of a lot of hard work. We have taken a bus to somewhere nearby, where we will wait for our turn to perform.

I join my friends by the buses. Anna and Micaiah say no, I can't come, and everyone leaves me standing on the sidewalk, mouth agape, to eat lunch by myself.

In the practice room, I am excited to prove to Matt Perry that I have finally found my mouthpiece. I pull it out of my backpack and display it proudly. I realize that it is almost time to perform and that none of my friends have concert attire on. I open the door and smugly tell them that they're late. It is good to one-up them, as I'm still sore at them due to the lunch circumstance.

We are onstage, ready to perform. My father is conducting. Instead of sitting in chairs, the horn section has small cots on which they can recline. My father raises his baton, and I realize I don't know where any of my music is. I have been given several books full of music, but unlike the rest of the band, I haven't taken the time to locate the songs we will be playing. I frantically shuffle through the pages as the music starts. I can't find any of the music I need. I throw the books to the floor and curl up on my cot to cry, furious at myself for not preparing properly. My father sees that I am distraught and cuts the band off, running to my side. I'm mad at him now, for placing me above the band, when they've all worked so hard to be here. As the curtains falls into place over the stage, I trudge out the back door, rather than face the wrath of the band and my so-called friends.

I am in a jungle. Rather, it is a very, very large room, filled with flora and fauna of an Indian climate. I have circled the premises once entirely and am now trying to find a way up. a large elephant swings his trunk over my head and back again; I try to grab it. However, it is smooth and I fall off every time. I know there's something else I need to find before I can climb the elephant.
Unfortunately, my failed attempts have set off a flood, which sweeps up all creatures in its path. I let it carry me along, aimlessly, until the waters have receded somewhat. I look around for a log or something to float with. Grabbing one, I tell my sister that it isn't floaty enough, we have to find something younger. I see a monkey floating by, trying to pull a large armored cart. It is not succeeding, and is pulled into a whirlpool. I lunge forward and try to save it as it goes under, but the monkey I come up with is only pulling a wicker basket, not a cart. I panic, those monkeys must be saved,
The jungle personnel clear the water away, and where the whirlpool was is a plastic bubble. Inside are the monkeys that were pulled under. I rejoice - this means we can save them - but the workers shake their heads sadly. They say they cannot save these monkeys; I do not understand. I frantically try to convince them that we can get the monkeys out before they run out of air, but the employees just stand there stonily. They say I saved one monkey, isn't that enough? I scream at them, no! but they gaze at me with their hard eyes and I see there is no hope.
I crouch in a corner, saddened and infuriated at the loss of life. I cannot tear my gaze away from the bubble as the monkeys run out of oxygen and slowly collapse.

The owner of the park is equally saddened by the loss. She says oftentimes she wishes the waters will not come, but then - she opens the front door and shows me the destroyed jungle, covered in a fine layer of snow - this happens, and she wishes she had not wished such things. I stand in her garage, trying to understand. She wraps her thin bathrobe sadly about her and turns to go back inside.

Imagination

A fraternity was giving away free pizza on the 15th. I had already had a slice of cheese, so I went back for a second: cinnamon pecan.

I found Kris waiting at a bus stop, and he asked me to explain things, so I started talking. The 74 came and stopped; I wondered if he was going to get on. Then I figured he must have been waiting for the 71, 72, or 73, but he was standing on the wrong side of the street. Finally we got on the 74 and it turned around and took us over the University Bridge.

Then we were walking along a sort of cement tunnel on the east edge of Lake Union. It was very narrow, so Kris walked in front of me. The right side was open to the lake, which was actually just a vast blue expanse of water, and part of the path was submerged, so that every step I took with my right foot made a gentle splash. I talked the whole way trying to sort out a confusing series of events, and Kris just kept walking until we suddenly reached a graffitied wall. He stopped to suddenly that I nearly stepped off the path into the water, but when I looked down the water churned viciously, and it was clear enough that I could tell there was no bottom.

In the Burien Fred Meyer, my mom and I shop for food for our vacation. There are stacks of chocolate cake, and we try to pick out the best one for my dad's birthday.

I stand with Rebecca and Evan in a neutrally carpeted lobby, waiting for the schedule for the undergraduate research symposium to be posted. Rebecca and Evan move to the other side to see if a group of Acads know where to go, and meanwhile, a suited man with a nametag and radio comes up to me and ushers me through the nearest set of double doors and into a small auditorium, insisting that there is no late seating.
Annoyed that I might be missing other good presentations I sit on the left side, near the front. The lights dim and a curly-haired girl stands at a podium on the right side of the stage as a screen lowers behind her. The film starts, and all I know from the program is that her research had to do with psychological/emotional reactions to music. For about two minutes it plays a rapid series of film clips accompanied by music. I don't remember what they contained, but I remember mainly blue, some green and white, and the charge I felt from the music. I think I at one point I was laughing and crying for a reason I couldn't fathom. The film ends and the girl says, "Thank you". Everyone waits for her to say more about her results and conclusion, and finally the symposium official comes up and whispers to her, but she shakes her head and leaves the stage.

There is a pause while the next student sets up, and I turn around and see Evan and Rebecca sitting behind me. I ask if they felt the same thing, but lights start to dim. The next presentation is by a friendly Indian guy, on "Imagination". His film starts with a scene in a cobblestone alleyway with high stone walls on either side, and it quickly envelops me.
I am a young boy, sent by his guardians to start at a school on this street. I walk up to the gate of the correct address and pause. I know this is a test when I look to my right down the alley, and past a certain archway the scene shimmers and changes to a different street. I'm not scared, and I look through the gate and ring the bell. The scene past the gate shimmers and changes, and a wizard-like man appears about two feet in front of me. We stare at each other for a while, and finally he lets me in. Other boys in orange robes peer suspiciously out the the barred windows, and one sets a rosebush on fire right next to me.
The wizard leads me through a cold stone hallway, and up and wide, orange-lit winding staircase with very tiny steps. When we reach the top the stair continue, only tilted so that it formed a corrugated horizontal plane. (Like this: /\/\/\/\/\/\). I try to walk on it, but the wizard open a door that I already passed and motions me through.

At this point I recount everything that happened in my dream previous to meeting Kris, including the events I tried explaining to him, (none of which I remember now). Then I start over from the beginning of the "Imagination" sequence, narrating it myself, while trying to follow along as best I can in my actions.

"He approached the impressive stone building..." (I turn to the right and read the plaque in the doorway of the building.)
"...No, these architects didn't mark the date of construction of the building..."
(There is a long list of roman numerals on the plaque)
"They marked the time of the accident... when the workers drowned... to harness the power of water in the walls of the school..." (It's getting harder to make sense of my narration, and finally I figure out that I'm supposed to be contemplating the wizard school across the street. I let myself in the gate, hoping I won't have enough time to make up more nonsense narration, and enter the building. I realize as a walk though rooms that change that I am waking up, and it's harder for my conscious mind to make up scenarios that will be as interesting for my active dream self as my unconscious mind could.
The thing I remember as I contemplated this was standing in a room where one wall was made of tall, sharp-edged irregular stone pillars spaced about six inches apart. A violent blue light shone through the gaps, but there was a rock garden on the other side.
I finally figured out that this was the Indian guy's test of Imagination.

Dark Staircase

Kellen and I decide to visit Holly at the video store. We go inside, but beyond the counters there are no movies, but instead the interior of a house. Holly tells us to put our bags down by the shoe rack. "Good thing you're both wearing black," she tells us. I look down and realize that I am wearing the same black ball gown I wore to winter ball. Kellen isn't actually wearing black, but apparently Holly hasn't noticed.
Cameron comes from behind the counter (he and Holly are both wearing their black work uniforms). He tells us that the party us upstairs, and he'll see us up there as soon as we're ready. As they both leave, I notice that the house is very dark, and the gray carpeting seems to glow where the moonlight shines through the sliding glass door. Kellen and I can hear muffled music from the party going on above us. We start up the staircase, even though we can't see the top because of the darkness.
We reach a square landing after only ten stairs, and the next staircase doubles back, quite like the emergency stairs in a multi-story hotel. I can see a balcony across the room, maybe three more stories up, where people are dancing. They are all wearing black.
I begin to notice that the stairs are getting steeper and narrower, although they are still carpeted. After five more flights, I realize that we should be at the party by now. But although I can still hear muffled music, I can no longer see a balcony, just dark walls. I wait for Kellen to catch up with me. Her black hair has come undone and is falling out all over the staircase. For some reason this does not worry me and I tell her we have to keep going.
Finally we reach what seems to be the last flight of stairs. It is so steep that, when I look up into it, it feels like I'm looking down into a deep chasm. The muffled music pulsates from deafening to inaudible. Kellen is terrified; she grabs my hand and tells me not to go up but I feel like I have to. I climb up one step, which by now is about two feet high and maybe six inches deep. As soon as my feet leave the ground, I feel myself being pulled upwards. Suddenly I am terrified. Kellen grabs my legs and pulls me back down, and we sprint back down the stairs until we are back by the shoe rack.
"We have to get out of here," I say, but I can't find my bag or my keys. I am frustrated by my dress. It won't let me move as quickly as I need to. I know we have to leave before the thing at the top of the staircase finds us, but I can't find anything. I decide to take off my dress. I have regular clothes underneath, but as soon as I get my dress off, the regular clothes begin to morph back into the dress. Finally I spot my bag underneath the shoe rack, and I lay down on my stomach so I can reach it. When I get up, Kellen is gone. The music is almost deafening. I know that I am going to die.

Triangular Baby Arrangement

I cross 15th going towards the lawn next to Parrington, where there is going to be a croquet match. start to pull myself over the high cement wall to get onto the lawn, when I see that Kris is there talking to Michelle Burce. He yells my name as I stumble over the wall, and I worry that it looks like I am running towards him. I walk up to him very slowly, wait for him to say something, and look into his eyes. Then I slap him, which would have been alot more satisfying if I had done it harder, or perhaps with my right hand. I pause, he turns away to talk to someone else, and I walk off.

Solstice is just north of the Henry, and Derrick is working when I come in. I put on some Radiohead and leave for class.

Class is a lecture of about 50 people on Parrington Lawn. I sit near the front, and hear a voice that I recognize. It is the British girl who comes into Solstice, sitting next to Seamus from the fashion show. I turn around quickly, hoping they didn't see me look. We can hear the music from Soltice very clearly, and it starts skipping. It skips on the same phrase for nearly a minute, and finally I get up to go fix it.

Now I'm getting into an elevator in a Hospital. There is a nurse already inside, and three babies on the ground at her feet. I am really nervous that they will get injured on the hard floor, but the nurse talks to us cheerfully about their condition. They are all bundled up in cute little outfits, and face the same direction, with a tiny triangular reflective marker at each of their heads, like the ones large trucks put out on the road when they have to stop in the middle of the street. All of the babies have way too much hair; the one in the teal fleece jumper has thick wavy black hair and is incredibly obese.